By Marlon De Blasio, Op-ed contributor

Christians are always encouraged to pray about it. The hope is that God will intervene favorably. We all know, however, that God doesn’t answer all of our prayers. Is it because He doesn’t care? Definitely not so. The Psalmist said confidently, “Evening and morning and at noon I utter my complaint and … he hears my voice” (Ps. 55:17).
God is always there for us, and the traditional understanding of prayer requires a refreshing reminder. Indeed, prayer is an important part of a believer’s relationship with God, but I believe it shouldn’t be approached solely as a spiritual exercise for obtaining material benefits. Prayer is also indispensable to commune with God “for obtaining mercy and finding grace to help in time of need” (Heb. 4:16).
In prayer, Christians should realize that their relationship with the Lord Jesus isn’t only for the here and now, but for eternity. Jesus taught us to pray, “Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven … and … deliver us from evil” (Matt. 6:10-13). Primarily, we are to pray for wisdom to live as the people of God in this broken world. As James emphasized, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God … and it will be given” (1:5). “Fighting the good fight of faith” (1 Tim. 6:12) requires prayer for ongoing insights that can only come from God Himself. We will then have the confidence to live Christian lives in a world that is unlike God. We will also be wise enough to identify with how Jesus followed His own prayer during His darkest hour, “not my will, but yours, be done” (Luke 22:42).
When my wife was battling ALS, I spent much time with her in hospitals. One summer afternoon, I went out to the hospital yard and sat on a bench. I was finding it unbelievable that such a thing could happen to us. There I thought deeply about the ordeal and prayed that God would help me to identify with Jesus, “not my will, but yours, be done.” It was hard, but He provided us with unprecedented inner strength, peace, wisdom, and a beautiful sense of emotional comfort to our family.
My wife fought with notable distinction. Often, she was commended by specialized doctors, nurses, personal care workers, and equipment technicians for how there was something exceptional about her reactions and peaceful state of emotions. We truly experienced what Paul wrote, “Blessed be the God … of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction” (2 Cor. 1:3-4).
Of course, the skeptical would point out that I am missing the greater point of why God allows humankind to suffer in the first place. What is almost always overlooked by the skeptic is how there is a lot of well-being in the world, too, and God gets no gratitude. God has provided an abundance of common gifts to believers and unbelievers: the capability to reason, to plan prosperous outcomes, and the fulfillment that results from the fruits of our labor. God has also given us the joys of social life, dinner parties and festive gatherings, taste buds for delicious food, hobbies, sports, entertainment, and it’s an intellectual injustice to attribute it all to strict natural processes. Deep down, we all know that it’s absurd that it all happened by fluke, blind luck, and with no purpose. Yet when calamities eventually happen, God is criticized for not caring. We must accept that to be human is to experience both happiness and suffering.
In Christ, we have a sure foundation to overcome the vicissitudes of life and even the ultimatum of death. So while we should continue to pray for favors and even for material gain, we should not lose trust in God when we don’t get a desired outcome.
In His Sermon on the Mount, Jesus promised, “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you” (Matt. 7:7). This encouragement was presented in the context of what Jesus had also said, “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things will be added to you” (Matt. 6:33). First, we seek strength for “peacemaking,” “meekness,” “purity of heart,” which characterizes “Your Kingdom come.” Then Jesus continued, “How much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask him” (Matt. 7:11). With proper perspective and priorities, God will grant us favorable outcomes. If and when He doesn’t, we should not fault ourselves or blame Him. We should remain thankful for His common gifts and that we have access to His comfort, love, joy and peace, which are indispensable for overcoming this broken world.
I submit to you that I don’t know why God answers some prayers and not others. That should not be our concern, for who am I or you to challenge Him? What should be the Christian concern is, “Your Kingdom come.” Our desire is for the grace of God to redeem many in this broken world, and for His ongoing strength and wisdom.
Some prayers will be answered, and some may not, but our trust in God shouldn’t be conditional upon always receiving desired outcomes. We should definitely continue to “ask, seek, and knock” while prioritizing the Lordship of Jesus, who promised, “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Heb. 13:5).
Marlon De Blasio, Ph.D. is a cultural apologist, Christian writer and speaker, and the author of Discerning Culture. For more info about Marlon visit his blog: thechristianangle.com
