By Allison Roberts, Op-ed contributor
I am a Portland mother of three. My oldest son, now 26, attended Lewis Elementary and had such a positive experience there that my husband and I built our home only blocks from Lewis so we could send our two younger children there as well. Lewis wasn’t just our neighborhood school. It was the school our family already knew and trusted.
I’ve lived my entire life in Portland, Oregon. I am also a Christian, and I believe parents have the right and the responsibility to know what their children are being taught. I never imagined that asking would get me banned from my children’s school.
It began when my 11-year-old brought home an “identity flower” assignment requiring him to identify his gender and share his answer with his class. I had received no advance notice and no opportunity to excuse him from an exercise that conflicted with my beliefs.
So, I did what parents do when they don’t understand something happening in their child’s classroom: I asked.
When I requested a meeting with the principal, I arrived to find three additional staff members waiting for me, including both of my children’s teachers and a school counselor. My questions were hardly revolutionary: What did “gender” mean in this assignment? What had the children been taught? Why hadn’t parents been informed?
At one point, my son’s teacher raised her voice and demanded, “Why do you need to know?”
Because he is my child.
It remains astonishing to me that this required an explanation.
The materials I eventually obtained only raised more questions. They instructed children to consider what gender “feels right” to them that day and suggested that the answer might later change.
People can disagree about whether that belongs in an elementary-school classroom. What should not be controversial is a parent’s right to know it is happening.
I joined the PTA in part so I could raise these concerns there, but when I asked to speak, I was prohibited from doing so. With that avenue closed, I wrote an open letter to other parents and distributed it peacefully from a public sidewalk outside the school.
Then came an argument with another parent during pickup. His wife and I had been speaking respectfully when he interrupted us, repeatedly shouting, “White people are disgusting!” within earshot of children. I called his comments racist, used language I regret, and walked away. I did not threaten him. I did not assault him. I was not arrested.
The next morning, police officers came to my home.
In front of my neighbors, they handed me an order barring me from my children’s school for one full calendar year for allegedly harmful and threatening behavior.
The man who raised his voice at me, to my knowledge, received no trespass order.
The principal then emailed the school community, accusing me of “harassment, intimidation, and threatening behavior” and referring to my views as “hate speech.” Parents were told to report me if they saw me on campus.
I appealed. Portland Public Schools (PPS) gave me a 30-minute Zoom “hearing” conducted by a panel consisting of two janitors and a basketball coach. One panelist emptied garbage cans while I spoke. No witnesses were called, and no meaningful evidence was presented.
They upheld the order, and because they did, I missed my son’s fifth-grade graduation.
Children get one fifth-grade graduation, and parents get one chance to be there for it. Other children looked at their mothers when they crossed that stage. My son looked for me and saw an empty chair.
PPS wasn’t finished.
When I later objected publicly to how I had been treated, the district threatened something far more consequential: it threatened to bar me permanently from every PPS property.
My daughter still has years left at this elementary school, and my son is beginning middle school. The message was difficult to misunderstand. Continue speaking, and you will be excluded from their schools forever.
So, I stopped.
That is the part of this story that should concern people regardless of what they think about gender, politics, or me.
Government doesn’t have to duct tape someone’s mouth shut to silence her. It merely has to make the price of speaking high enough. For me, that price was the possibility of losing access to my children’s schools forever. And for a while, it worked.
But parents do not need the government’s permission to ask what public employees are teaching their children. We do not surrender our right to criticize public officials when we enroll our children in public schools. Disagreement does not become “harassment” simply because officials find the speaker difficult or her opinions unwelcome.
That is why I am suing PPS.
I’m not asking a court to agree with my opinions. I’m asking the court to affirm that government officials cannot punish parents for questioning them, and that access to our children’s education cannot depend upon saying only what those officials want to hear.
I cannot get my son’s graduation back. That day is gone. But I can refuse to let fear silence me.
Allison Roberts is a resident of Portland, OR and the parent of three children. Her case, Roberts v. Portland Public Schools, et al. was filed in the U.S. District Court for the District of Oregon on August 12, 2026.
