Angel Still Guarding Eden With Flaming Sword Wondering If He Can Move Yet
EDEN — Having gone an inordinate length of time standing watch in the same place for many, many years, the angel guarding the Garden of Eden with a flaming sword…
EDEN — Having gone an inordinate length of time standing watch in the same place for many, many years, the angel guarding the Garden of Eden with a flaming sword…
CINCINNATI, OH — A new study from the Center for Television Research shows humanity is deeply yearning for creators to produce more of the beloved ’90s cartoon Animaniacs.
BETHSAIDA — Reports confirmed that Jesus of Nazareth had successfully fed a crowd of 5,000 men, plus women and children, using just five barley loaves and two small fish, achieving…
SOUTH BEND, IN — The debate over dangerous pets heated up again after a woman took her pet velociraptor out for a walk and declared, “There aren’t any bad pets,…
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Staff for Mitch McConnell assured the nation that the Kentucky senator had been dropped off at a nice farm in the country where he would be much…
DALLAS, TX — Local husband Mark Higgins stood frozen in his kitchen Thursday morning, staring blankly at a glass jar labeled “Vanilla Honey Goat Butter Spread” while attempting to figure…
KYIV — President Donald Trump scheduled an emergency trip to Ukraine to ask President Zelenskyy for American missiles.
Burritos are really, really expensive these days, apparently. But fear not — there are still ways to get them without having to shell out $20 a pop. You just have…
CHICAGO, IL — One local customer was caught off guard by a new policy at his favorite restaurant chain, as the Chipotle cashier told the man that there would be…
HOLLYWOOD, CA — A defunct Falcon 9 SpaceX rocket crashed into a Hollywood sound stage on Wednesday night, leaving an enormous crater almost 75 feet wide.