By Chuck Bentley, CP Guest Contributor
Dear Chuck,
My spouse and I were happier back in the days of our first tiny apartment than we are in our four-bedroom dream house. The maintenance, the bills, and the “needs” our children have are mounting. How can we break free from the financial stress we live with?
Dreaming of Less Stress
Dear Dreaming of Less Stress,
Many people can identify with your desire to escape financial stress. Even if we achieve all of our financial goals, it can leave us empty. The pursuit of the world and the things it offers is spiritually unfulfilling. True contentment is only found in Christ and the pursuit of His Kingdom. Since life here is temporary, we must learn to focus on the eternal.
We are God’s ambassadors in a world run by the prince of darkness. Materialism confronts us constantly, seeking to distract us from our mission. The enemy wants us to believe that fulfillment is one purchase away, while Christ invites us to find our satisfaction in Him.
Let me suggest three areas to help reduce your stress: delighting in the Lord, making lifestyle adjustments, and enjoying the benefits of simplicity.
Delight Yourself in the Lord
“Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4 ESV).
This verse does not mean God will give us whatever we want. The truth is more powerful than that! When we delight in the Lord, He shapes our desires. Our hearts become aligned with His heart, and our priorities begin to reflect His priorities. So, delight in Him, follow hard after Him, and wisely manage what He’s entrusted to you. When our greatest delight is God, money loses its power to control us. We are less driven by comparison, status, or the endless pursuit of more. We begin to ask, “How can I honor God with what He has entrusted to me?”
Delighting in the Lord cultivates contentment. We become grateful for what we have rather than constantly chasing what we don’t. This protects us from overspending, unnecessary debt, and the pressure to keep up with others.
It also fuels generosity. When we find our joy in serving God rather than accumulating possessions, it becomes easier to give. We recognize that money is a tool for serving others and advancing God’s purposes rather than simply increasing our own comfort.
Here are a few helpful guardrails:
- Determine your core values and create a family purpose statement. Review it regularly.
- Prioritize what matters and eliminate things that add no value to your family.
- Limit commitments that distract, divide the family, or contradict your values.
- Trade screen time for conversation, reading books, family activities, and serving others.
Proceed humbly without complaint or comparison. Practice gratitude in prayer and by verbalizing thankfulness as a family every day.
Make lifestyle adjustments
Significantly reduce stress by altering your lifestyle. Your question leads me to ask if you and your spouse have considered moving out of the dream home. If you are experiencing financial stress, then why not downsize? Most children are resilient and quickly adapt as long as mom/dad are happy.
Should you sell your cars? Possibly. If your cars cost you too much to insure and drive, look for less expensive used models, especially those you won’t have to finance. Seek vehicles that retain their value and have lost initial depreciation. This is a great lesson to teach children.
Reducing your mortgage and car payments can free up money to pay off debt, build emergency savings, and create margin. Selling unnecessary possessions provides income for school supplies, groceries, etc. Cut streaming services, negotiate outstanding bills, and eliminate any expenses that are not conducive to a simple lifestyle.
If your financial stress is severe, temporarily stop all unnecessary spending. Doing without can seem overwhelming for a family because it is initially foreign and uncomfortable, but decreased stress is a great payoff.
Seek the Lord; read and meditate on Scripture. Talk to financially wise older people whom you highly trust and respect. As Proverbs 11:14 says, “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety” (ESV). Do life with people of a like mindset so you can encourage one another.
Benefits of living simply
Living simply is a mindset that refuses to allow the world to crowd out Christ and His Kingdom. It affects our behavior, challenges onlookers, and ultimately impacts our future.
Living simply creates financial margin.
When we spend less than we earn, we gain freedom. We can build an emergency fund, eliminate debt, save for the future, and give generously. Instead of being controlled by monthly payments, we have greater flexibility to respond to God’s leading. Financial hardship and stress are reduced.
Living simply provides time.
When not preoccupied with supporting an oversized lifestyle, we often have more time for family, church, friendships, service, and resting in God’s presence. We discover that life’s greatest treasures cannot be purchased.
Living simply gives spiritual clarity.
Material abundance can subtly shift our trust away from God. Simplicity helps us remember that every good gift comes from God. It reminds us that we are stewards, not owners. It teaches us that money is a tool, not our master.
Living simply is a powerful witness to the world.
In a culture driven by consumption, contentment stands out. When the world says accumulate, generosity stands out. A family that values relationships over possessions stands out. People notice when we refuse to let money define our identity.
This doesn’t mean every Christian should live the same lifestyle. God blesses people with different resources and different callings. The question isn’t how much you own but whether your possessions help you fulfill God’s purposes. The battle against materialism is won long before we enter a store or click “buy now.” It’s won in the heart when we let Christ shape our desires and reject the lies of culture. It helps to remember that every financial decision is a spiritual one.
Extra Reading
Choosing to Live Like You’re Poor
10 Reasons Why a Simple Lifestyle Can Boost Your Happiness
Living Beneath Your Means
Crown has many biblically based, practical, and empowering courses and studies that can help you reduce stress and find freedom in your finances. Learn how to be a grateful financial steward of the resources God provides.
Chuck Bentley is CEO of Crown Financial Ministries, a global Christian ministry, founded by the late Larry Burkett. He is the host of a daily radio broadcast, My MoneyLife, featured on more than 1,000 Christian Music and Talk stations in the U.S., and author of his most recent book, Economic Evidence for God?. Be sure to follow Crown on Facebook.
