2
.</p>
<p> Herewith, we present an excerpt from the book’s introduction.</p>
<hr>
<h2>Promise, Me American</h2>
<p>Let me start the, you know, um, the thing with TWO WORDS: I wrote this book all by myself.</p>
<p>Folks, look … first of all, it’s — it’s good to be here. Or there. Wherever we are. Jill says, “Joey, you oughta write a book,” and I said, “Come on, man, who wants to read a, a, the ….” Anyway.</p>
<p>I’ve lived a long time. Longer than … well, you know the thing. I rode the Amtrak — more miles than, uh, the conductor, Corn Pop, he knew. Good guy. Bad dude. Hairy legs. Kids used to rub ’em in the pool. That’s how you build character.</p>
<p>People ask me, “Joe, what’s your secret?” I say, “No joke.” That’s the secret. Also … anyway.</p>
<p>I’ve met every world leader. Xi. Ukraine’s President Putin. Chancellor … uh … France. Prime Minister of Germany. You know, the fella. I know more world leaders than any one of you ever met in your whole goddamn life. They’d say, “Joe, America’s back,” and I’d say, “God love ya.”</p>
<p>Now, some folks say I misspeak. Malarkey. I don’t mis … mis … look, here’s the deal. Words are words. If you can understand what I meant, then I probably said it. And if I didn’t, well, that’s on the teleprompter. Pause.</p>
<p>This book tells the story of Scranton, Delaware, and all fifty-seven states. The triumphs. The setbacks. The thing. My dad used to say, “Joey …” — well, he said a lot of things. Great guy.</p>
<p>Now, here’s the deal. </p>
<p>Lejraslajasrkjalse;rjpvnaskodfjalsnflaskdjfaslknflasdkjfpeijfwoaenfalsdjflaskdjflasdjnflasdkjf;pjasdfnalskdfjaslkdfjaisdfpqeifqlkenflaskndflaksjhdflaskndfaskndfadsfmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.</p>
<p>That’s not hyperbole. </p>
<p>I wanna give a special shoutout to my vice president, Donald Trump. She will make a great president one day. And thank you, Jackie Walorski, for your help editing my book. And thank you, too, Chuck Graham … stand up and take a bow! I also want to thank that articulate and bright and clean and nice-looking black guy, whatshisname. I mean, that’s storybook, man.</p>
<p>So, turn the page. C’mon. Don’t just stand there like a lying dog-faced pony soldier.</p>
<p>Anyway …</p>
<p>— Written by Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. (and no one else)</p>
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