For many Christian families, parenting is both a calling and a challenge. However, within the Black Christian community in the UK, that calling often unfolds against a backdrop of cultural complexity, historical trauma and social pressures.
These themes were touched on during a recent Keep The Faith online talk, where psychotherapist and ordained minister Dr Kenisha Jackson shared her insights into raising emotionally healthy children.
Dr Jackson, founder of KEW Education and Therapy, a consultancy supporting children and families, grounded her message in Scripture, reminding listeners that Christian parents are not without guidance.
“Up until recently I would have said there’s no manual for raising children,” she said. “But we do have a manual, we have the Word of God.”
Before offering practical advice, she challenged parents to examine their own identity in Christ.
“Knowing who we are really is the essence of everything,” she explained. “This self-awareness, she argued, is foundational to raising children who are secure, confident and rooted in faith.”
Dr Jackson emphasised that parenting must be shaped not just by what is taught in church, but by what is lived at home.
“Children are watching all the time,” she said. “It’s not ‘do what I say’, it’s ‘do what I do’.”
From prayer and worship to everyday conversations, children form their understanding of God by observing the faith of those around them, she reminded parents.
This lived faith becomes especially important when families face wider societal challenges.
Drawing on her experience within the NHS and education system, Dr Jackson highlighted disparities affecting Black children, from higher exclusion rates in schools to barriers in accessing mental health support.
“These are not statistics, these are real people with real lived experiences,” she said.
At the heart of her message was a call for healing, both spiritually and emotionally.
“We’ve learned as a community to just keep going,” she noted, “but the body keeps the score.”
For Christian parents, this means recognising the impact of generational trauma and bringing it before God.
“We have to ensure that we’re not parenting from pain,” she warned, encouraging believers to seek both prayer and support when needed.
Prayer, she stressed, is not a last resort but a central strategy.
“There are some challenges that are bigger than us … we have to pray to get to the root of what is happening,” she said.
Alongside prayer, she emphasised the importance of equipping children with truth and wisdom.
“Train up a child in the way they should go, and they may stray, but they will come back,” she said.
Communication, she said, must also reflect Christ-like love.
“When a child is being yelled at, they feel it,” she said. “They can quickly feel ‘I’m not loved’.”
She reminded parents that grace must extend both ways.
“There is no such thing as perfect parenting,” she said. “You’re parenting your child at this stage, for the first time.”
Dr Jackson framed parenting as a spiritual responsibility as much as a practical one.
Success, she suggested, is not measured by outcomes alone but by openness to God’s guidance.
“Success for me looks like being open … and not being afraid of the unknown,” she said. “Sometimes it’s bigger than what we see in the natural.”
