Citing robust support for its measures including a sharp reduction or outright repeal of the estate tax, a new report published Thursday revealed that the Republican tax overhaul is supported by a majority of Americans currently suffocating their wealthy benefactor with a pillow. “Both the House and Senate tax plans enjoy a healthy 87 percent approval rating among citizens whose hands are tightly gripping a pillowcase and firmly pressing it down over the face of a bedridden family member or patron until they stop struggling,” said lead author Alice Zarzycki, noting that nearly nine in 10 Americans whispering “shh, shh, sleep now” as their thrashing benefactor landed increasingly feeble blows to their arms and chest indicated that the proposed legislation would considerably improve their personal financial situation.
